How To Make a Single's Life Worthy

How much are you worth? Find out your real value.

“We make a living by what we get,
but we make a life by what we give.”
~ Sir Winston Churchill

Are you worth your money? Are you worth your possession? Are you worth your status in life? Are you worth your position in society? Are you worth your business?

Photo by geralt |

What we think is our worth

Many of us think that we are worthier because we accumulate wealth. The fact is without our possessions we are nothing. Even if we add up all our treasures, we are dispensable. When we die, what we did and what others had become because of us would make us. Our money, gold or any other wealth does not measure us as a person.

Photo by bykst |

When we die, people will talk about our deeds and our influence on others.

Have you attended a funeral service? In the eulogy, family and friends of the dead person will stand up on the podium to give their speech. They don’t brag about the dead person’s bank savings. They talk about how the dead spent it for the needy when he was still living; how he or she used it to help somebody. They don’t brag about the skyscraper the dead built or the business empire made. They talk about how the dead person treated his or her employees, the lowest in the rank and file.

When we die, our character and our humanity lives on.

As singles, we have lots of opportunities to climb up the corporate ladder. We have lots of time to focus on our business, to grow it and be a successful businessperson. If we have a good-paying job, we can buy clothes, jewelry, a house and lot, car etc… We can save up and invest easier.

Because of this "power", we are prone to weigh our worth on these material things. We have the tendency to be proud of our accomplishment (the wrong way) and think that society shouldn’t look down on us because we achieved much. We have to guard ourselves against this. Or else, we undervalue our true worthiness.

It isn’t right that society should treat us less of a person because of our civil status. People should not be mean to single parents or to unmarried persons. Just like them, we are also entitled to a peaceful living and equal protection of the law.

However, being humans prone to the danger of falling for false worthiness, we are encouraged to determine and enrich our real worth.

Who am I?

“If I strip myself of all my belongings and earthly possessions, who am I?” This one question will help us rediscover our purpose in life, our humanity, and ourselves. 

Who am I?

I encountered this question when I attended a retreat in 2003 (if my memory serves me right). I wrote, “I am a daughter and a sister”. I thought my answer was good enough. Upon discussing it with the spiritual director, he asked me another question. He said, “Without your parents and siblings, who are you?” He asked further, “If you are to die, who are you?”

It was a hard question. I was cornered. He explained that as humans, we live here on earth temporarily. What I should aspire for is the permanent that way my foundation is strong.

Our real value

Who we are to our family is something that will last. What we did to others will be remembered than our name or our face. How we treat the persons we love and the people who depend upon us will be remembered. We must strive for these things. But it is hard to maintain the effort without God. Without God, we will give up just as easily. Along the difficult trail, we will stop.

Two single persons came in my mind – Mother Theresa and the Dalai Lama. These persons have a huge and positive effect on people they encountered. Both are humble people. Both lived a simple life. Both walk without foot sandals.

Mother Theresa had cared for wounded, for the outcast, for the poorest of the poor. She took care of them without wearing mask or gloves. She held them without letting them think they are dirty or sick. She worked without making so much fuss or broadcasting her accomplishments.

About the Dalai Lama, his philosophy, as universal as it is, is popular. His steadfastness to fight for Tibetan people’s right without shedding blood is something. Such man of peace! Such determination! He remains unfazed even in his exile. His people and many people throughout the world still look up to him.   

Going back to the example in the fourth paragraph, what would you like to leave to people around you? What is your legacy? What would you like the people who know you to remember you by? What is your gift to them? What would you like strangers you encounter from time to time to feel around you? What would you be to yourself?

We don’t need to be exactly like Mother Theresa or the Dalai Lama. We don’t need to copy what they did. We can set our own footprints. Where we flourish, we can nurture it.

Our status as a single - by choice or by circumstance - is a gift. We must enjoy this gift. We must use it properly and wisely, too! We only have one life to live so it is fine if we stay a blessed single. A blessed single who live not just for himself or herself but for others too. A blessed single whose life is dedicated to God and His people.


Popular posts from this blog

Popular Jeepney Sayings

Etiquette in a Jeepney

Single Blessedness